Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
