checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
