i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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