its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
