Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
