Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
