walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Randomize
