the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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