Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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