dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
