Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
PANTIES FOUND
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
