Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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