Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
