one two three fourrrrnication!
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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