worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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