it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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