Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
