she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
