I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
