I want you more than these girls want KFC
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
