Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
He had one of those small greek statue penises
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
