I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
