do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
