You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
