i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
