As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize
