She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
