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Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
