Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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