i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
