Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
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