belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
We need to rekindle our bromance
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
