nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
