id be glad to
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
