she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
