accomplished twins. life is a go
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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