is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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