time to smoke my breakfast
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
