Is it because I queefed?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
