So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize