One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
