Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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