Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
