your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
All the doctor said was why
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
