kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
