i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
