the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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