Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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