Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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