the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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