Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
